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Translation: marchmallow
After reuniting with Uncle Yu and the others, Feng Sheng did not leave the capital right away and instead sought an inn to dwell in.
Feng Sheng reasoned that since the Wei Prince Manor had lost a princess consort, leaving the capital would become an onerous feat, so waiting was the better option. Over the years, it had become common practice for Uncle Yu and the others to heed whatever Feng Sheng said. Since no one refuted, the group began searching for an inn.
At first, everyone only took it as Feng Sheng wanting to lie low until the fuss died down before leaving, but they didn’t budge even after three or four days. This being the case, what else did they not understand? Miss had no desire to embark and was waiting for the Prince to look for her so the two could reconcile.
Of course, they could only harbor such thoughts in private. On the surface, everyone still operated as usual, but if someone familiar with Dao Qi and the others’ usual style were to analyze it, one could perceive that they had no intention to leave because their carriage had been parked and their baggage unloaded. It didn’t at all give one the impression that they were leaving in a few days.
During the day, Feng Sheng switched to her male disguise and drank tea in the teahouse across the inn.
Along the streets, wine shops, teahouses, and other such places were the fastest sources of abundant information, but no news about the Wei Prince Manor had cropped up. Feng Sheng was not at all deterred, and she still ventured out to drink tea every day. No one knew whether she wanted to garner information about the Wei Prince Manor or was just alleviating her boredom.
On this day, on the second floor, on a table near the window lay two plates of melon seeds, fruit, and a pot of the highest quality Biluochun1 as per usual.
Nowadays, a teahouse not only had tea for the guests to drink, but it also boasted an abundance of various entertainment. There was the singing of folk tunes, storytelling, and the playing of pipa so as not to bore the guests.
This day, a storytelling was underway. There stood an ignorant youth and a blind old man. The youth was playing the sanxian2 in a seemingly solemn manner, while the blind old man matched his vehement and impassioned narrative to the beat of the bamboo clapper boards. Feng Sheng had a good view of the first floor’s great hall, so she drank tea and listened to the storytelling as she observed the movements on the first floor.
Just as she listened to the climax, a voice suddenly interposed beside her, “Feng Sheng, is that you?”
The voice sounded slightly familiar. Feng Sheng opened her eyes and looked over.
The man standing across the table was wearing a blue robe. He had a slightly slender stature and an upright posture. He was as handsome as a crown of jade, though one could detect a hint of gloom between his brows.
“You?” Feng Sheng repeatedly blinked in astonishment. “Sun Wen Cheng?”
Sun Wen Cheng broke into a pleasantly surprised smile and faltered a little before saying, “When I looked over, I immediately thought that the person resembled you, but I was too hesitant to approach. I’ve never expected to actually chance upon you. Why are you here dressed like this?”
“I……” Feng Sheng seemed a little embarrassed and was rendered speechless.
The two sat facing each other wordlessly, but Sun Wen Cheng shattered the silence with a question. He sat opposite Feng Sheng with ardent eyes, beneath which was an indescribable misery.
“Have you been well? I never would have thought I’d see you once more. I had assumed we would never meet again in this lifetime.”
“I’m quite well. I didn’t think there would be such a coincidence.”
Another awkward silence fell. This time, Feng Sheng took the lead to converse, “What are you doing here? Are you looking for someone?”
“I have some business within the area, but when I dropped by, the person wasn’t around. I had no choice but to look for a place to drink tea in while waiting in case he comes back in a little while.”
Feng Sheng nodded her head and said nothing more.
Sun Wen Cheng also grew quiet, but neither did he leave.
“I’ll have a waiter serve tea,” Feng Sheng said, appearing as though she had just roused from a dream.
The waiter served tea. After such an interruption, it no longer seemed so awkward. At least, Sun Wen Cheng reverted to his normal self and confronted Feng Sheng with a calmer gaze.
“When I returned from the major exam, I was faced with the fact that you had left. You and I had separated, but I knew nothing of it,” he said a while after drinking tea. Other than a tinge of melancholy in his tone, his voice didn’t sound too agitated.
“I……”
“They told me you that you actively threw yourself at the prince because of your conceit. I didn’t believe them. I’m perfectly aware that you’re not that type of person.”
Feng Sheng raised her eyes to look at him. The bitterness on his face was sheerly apparent.
Pondering about it, although he didn’t hail from noble ancestors, when all was said and done, his family was still considered an influential household. His family had doted on him since he was young. He was naturally intelligent and had a knack for studying. Furthermore, he never suffered a single setback.
The only disgrace that fazed his life ought to be her. No matter how the Sun family narrated the incident to him, it would never erase the shame his wife’s betrayal had brought forth.
Feng Sheng had done countless things in her life, but she couldn’t have weathered through everything with a clear conscience. For her, the solitary thing she endeavored with a guilty conscience was the crooked and dishonest means she had employed to smoothly cut ties with the Sun family.
“I scoured for you in Shaoxing, but no one would reveal to me your whereabouts. They merely told me that your family had been expelled from the clan. I’ve been living pretty well these past few years. I obtained a scholarly honor and became an official. I could’ve accomplished what I had promised you at that time, but you disappeared.”
“Sun Wen Cheng……”
“Let me finish, alright?” He did not look up, but the pleading in his voice was evident. Feng Sheng could only swallow what she wanted to say.
“I heard news about you again. You ought to have been at the Court of Judicial Review at that time. It was only then that I understood why you wanted a separation agreement and why you jumped into the trap despite knowing what it was. It was all because you wanted to leave the Sun family to reverse your father’s verdict. I had wanted to save you, but I couldn’t. Then, I heard that Prince Wei had married your sister, but since when did you have a sister? So, it’s still you, isn’t it, Princess Consort Wei?”
Feng Sheng looked at him and nodded. “You didn’t guess wrong. It’s true. I apologize for leaving without so much as a word of farewell, but were I to choose again, I would still do it.”
“Then why didn’t you write me a letter? Am I such an intolerant and timid person in your heart?” Sun Wen Cheng smiled desolately.
Why didn’t you write?
Thinking of this, Feng Sheng couldn’t help but drift into a trance once more.
Because she didn’t dare. Because she was already ridden with guilt. She hadn’t wanted to encumber him any further. She was perfectly aware of how heavy she weighed in his heart, so she chose to dodge and elude him to cool the feelings he had for her. After all, her situation at that time was already precarious at the outset. She didn’t even expect to survive after finishing what she had wanted to do.
But all this, Feng Sheng would never tell Sun Wen Cheng. The past was the past.
“Then why are you here now, Princess Consort Wei?”
These words were a bit jarring. Feng Sheng couldn’t help but raise her eyebrows.
“Is it because he treats you badly?” Hiding beneath that gentle and elegant face was an almost avaricious thirst, but it was well-concealed. Although Feng Sheng felt a little discomfited, she simply regarded herself as the cause of it.
She uttered no response, feeling that the other party was somewhat overstepping his bounds.
She was about to say something and leave, but someone suddenly approached the table and called out ‘Young Master’. Immediately afterwards, the other party seemed to have caught sight of Sun Wen Cheng and stammered, “Fourth, Fourth Young Master……”
“Aren’t you Zhi Chun?”
“Fourth Young Master, I’m Zhi Chun. Why are you here? Isn’t it such a coincidence that you ran into Miss?” Zhi Chun’s eyes glimmered, darting back and forth between the two.
“I……”
Feng Sheng interrupted, “Zhi Chun, what’s the matter?”
“It’s nothing. Uncle Yu is worried about you, so this servant came over to check.”
Feng Sheng stood up and told Sun Wen Cheng, “I still have some things to do, so I won’t stay any longer and will have to excuse myself.”
After saying that, she ambled downstairs, and Zhi Chun followed behind and left.
*
In fact, it was useless to evade. That day, Zhi Chun’s words clearly indicated that they were staying at the inn, so Sun Wen Cheng very quickly came to find them.
Feng Sheng disliked seeing him too often. The only time she showed him her face was on his first visit. After that, she avoided him as much as she could, but Sun Wen Cheng refused to let her off, coming over every day to pester her.
Faced with such a situation, Zhi Qiu was bereft of speech, and Uncle Yu was even more reticent than expected. On the other hand, Sun Wen Cheng seemed to have acquired a lot of information from Zhi Chun and grew more and more fervent. They could no longer see the desolate expression he had worn the first day he ran into Feng Sheng.
Zhi Qiu occasionally quibbled with Zhi Chun, but it was rather ineffective. Zhi Chun was just and forceful in her reasoning, articulating that the Fourth Young Master was not an outsider, but the miss’s former husband. The past incident had triggered Zhi Chun’s reticence, but Sun Wen Cheng’s presence instantly renewed her vigor. She seemed to have completely forgotten why Feng Sheng was here now despite accounting for a large part of the reason why.
Though to say she was wrong, she also didn’t seem wrong. She had merely expressed her concern for Feng Sheng, and Prince Wei happened to have overheard them. Feng Sheng declaring that she wanted a separation agreement wasn’t Zhi Chun’s decision. Prince Wei had brought back a woman, but that also had nothing to do with her. Furthermore, she had not the slightest impure thoughts about Prince Wei like Zhi Qiu had accused her of out of spite.
Therefore, no one could say that she was wrong, including Zhi Qiu.
Like what Zhi Chun had said, Sun Wen Cheng was her former husband. These words rendered Feng Sheng speechless, because when they got to the heart of the matter, only she herself was the one in an undesirable situation. After all, she was the one who wronged Sun Wen Cheng.
……
Feng Sheng decided to leave.
She had intended to depart the next day, but who knew that Sun Wen Cheng would seek her out the night before?
“Why are you suddenly leaving?” He appeared rather perplexed, wearing an expression that seemed like he was caught unawares.
“This is an inn. It goes without saying that people only stay here temporarily.”
“Then, where do you plan on going?” Seemingly aware of his own alacrity, Sun Wen Cheng displayed a botched smile and explained, “I’m merely asking out of concern.”
“Perhaps return to Shaoxing, or perhaps sojourn in Yangzhou or Suzhou. It’s still uncertain. Perhaps we’ll just be meandering about.”
“Can’t you stay?” There came another abrupt and crass question.
Seeing her look over in surprise, his eyes flickered. He smiled wryly. “What I actually want to say is, if you truly intend to separate with Prince Wei, you can consider me. Give us a chance to start afresh.”
Feng Sheng’s eyes changed.
After a while, she said, “Why did you, what made you think that?”
“Is it so astonishing to you that I have such intentions? I’ve always believed that I was able to express my emotions clearly enough for you to have understood. Since the day you moved to Autumn Hall, were you truly unable to discern my feelings after all I had done? I was under the impression that we could mutually respect and love each other until old age, but so many things transpired, and many tried to break us apart. My greatest wish at that time was to pass the exam, obtain a scholarly honor, and take you away……”
“No.” Feng Sheng suddenly shook her head. “What you love is not me. You’re simply mistaking your attachment for love.”
Perhaps because she said this too calmly that Sun Wen Cheng took a good look at her.
“I have to admit that I was truly at fault for leaving with not even a word of farewell. Since Zhi Chun has told you a lot about me, then you should know that I was reluctant to marry you from the start. I never wanted to marry, but my father compelled me……”
“But you already married me! If it weren’t for your father’s mishap, you’d still be my Sun family’s woman!” Sun Wen Cheng blatantly interjected.
“Right.” Feng Sheng nodded her head and went on, “If my father hadn’t encountered that misfortune, I would perhaps still be a woman of the Sun family, but merely as Fang Feng Sheng, not the image of Fang Feng Sheng you’ve conjured in your head.”
This was somewhat discomfiting to voice out, but strangely enough, Sun Wen Cheng was able to comprehend it.
“Neither of your marriages were of your own volition, but what about Prince Wei? Aren’t you doing quite well as Princess Consort Wei? I haven’t heard a single word about your unwillingness in the past year or so.”
Feng Sheng peered at him with rather peculiar eyes and responded, “That’s different.”
“What’s different? Weren’t you driven to a corner? His Majesty wanted to kill you, so Prince Wei married you to save your life. Could it be that you’re just using him the way you and your father used my Sun family?” Sun Wen Cheng now seemed a bit choleric. His hurried words were laced with sarcasm, which was quite against his usual character.
“There’s a difference. From the start, I was never willing to marry you. As for him, I wanted to marry him.”
Sun Wen Cheng curtly raised his head and gazed into Feng Sheng’s eyes. He had never expected Feng Sheng to convey him such a look. He did his utmost to remain unabashed, but he couldn’t restrain his gentle façade from distorting.
As he perceived a touch of pity in her eyes, a slight chill surged in his heart.
“So, was your so-called plan to leave and meander about actually a lie? Are you truly planning to return to the Wei Prince Manor?”
Feng Sheng refused to answer.
“Aren’t you afraid he will disdain you for your incapability to bear children?”
With a ‘pa’ sound, something fell on the ground, and the din of shattering porcelain instantaneously followed.
They looked over to see that it was Zhi Chun, who had been carrying the tea.
“Zhi Chun, why are you so careless?” Zhi Qiu heard the noise and scurried over to check.
“I……” Panicked and flustered, Zhi Chun stooped to pick up fragments of the teacup, but her eyes still gravitated towards where the other two were.
“Did Zhi Chun also tell you that? Or did you both plot this together?” Feng Sheng’s astute eyes expressed volumes. After a pause, she said, “Sun Wen Cheng, you still lost control of yourself.”
Sun Wen Cheng’s face finally cracked.
Author’s Note:
Feng Sheng didn’t really want to fall out with Sun Wen Cheng or Zhi Chun.
1 碧螺春: biluochun or pi lo chun, a type of green tea grown in the Dongting Mountain region near Lake Tai, Jiangsu
2 三弦: sanxian, large family of 3-stringed plucked musical instruments, with snakeskin covered wooden soundbox and long neck, used in folk music, opera and Chinese orchestra