Wishing You Eternal Happiness 25
Wishing You Eternal Happiness
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Translation: marchmallow
Chapter 25
Marry Pei You’an!
***
Jiafu hung her head in silence.
With Jiafu’s hand still in her grasp, Zhang Fengtong said, “Zhen meimei, I know a little about you and the Heir. The Heir is a giant among men, rare in this world, and he is passionately enamored of you. Never have I seen him treat a woman with as much affection as he does you……”
She paused for a moment, then went on, “The Heir had you brought all the way here from your home, so you must have suffered a fright all through your journey, which also brought about this misunderstanding. In truth, the Heir could not bear treating you like that, but he has his own difficulties harrowing him. The reason for this, you will understand in the future. You must know that everything he had done was out of love for you. I am fortunate to be betrothed to him, but the Heir has yet to settle down because of me, and he has very few people around him who can give him their assiduous and thoughtful attention. Whenever I reflect on it, I cannot help but blame myself constantly. Upon learning that he had chanced upon you and immediately took an interest in you, I was immensely pleased. I may not be the most virtuous person, but I believe I still possess a smattering of magnanimity. As long as you nod your head now, you will never be wronged again. If the concubine position will not be bestowed to you at an opportune time in the future, who else will we give it to? When that time comes, we will be as intimate as true sisters attending to the Heir, sharing wealth and honor. Is that not a wonderful thing? If you have any concerns, or should you need help, just let me know, and I will do my utmost to assist you.”
After her speech, she gazed at Jiafu with an affable smile.
Jiafu remained uncommunicative. The room sank into dreary silence, and an awkward air seemed to prevail over them.
Zhang Fengtong coughed softly and was about to open her mouth to speak, when Jiafu suddenly pulled her hand away from her clasp and raised her head.
”Zhang jiejie,1 I am truly honored that you came to see me, it is just that I am too stupid to fathom your meaning, and the word ‘concubine’ is all I understand. Does jiejie want me to be the Heir’s concubine? I may hail from a merchant family of humble status, but my mother has taught me since young that to be a poor wife is preferable to becoming a rich concubine. My mother had been burdened with guilt for not allowing my father to take a concubine, which violated the feminine virtues; fortunately, not only did my father not find it pernicious, but he pleasantly concurred despite being denied the right. He married my mother, she remained his only woman all his life, her love and respect for him were requited, and they lived in marital harmony. When I was a child, I would sometimes overhear the private conversations between my father and mother. He had once expressed that, even if my mother would one day initiate it, he still would not accept. No matter how many women graced this world, she alone was the woman he loved and respected. How could he be willing to let another woman by his side and wrong her……”
Zhang Fengtong maintained her smile, but this incipiently dignified smile had slightly stiffened.
Yet Jiafu also plastered on a smile, one so innocent and beautiful. “Zhang jiejie, I have only been here for a few days, yet I have heard of your virtuous reputation. Your words just now have greatly enlightened me. Jiejie, you truly are the paragon of womanly virtue worth looking up to. That night, I really had no idea that the nobleman who had me brought here was the Heir. I was terrified of suffering a living hell after that granny and her group abducted me, so I made the move to escape. If that woman had made it clear to me from the start that he was the Heir, I would not have fled like that. In spite of my family background, I was fortunate enough to have caught the Heir’s eye and to have met a person as magnanimous as you, Zhang jiejie, but thinking about the earnest teachings my mother had previously instilled in me, I am also at a loss at what to do. More than that, this matter concerns my life. Without my family’s permission, if I decide merely on my own whim, I fear that others will someday find out and scoff at me for engaging in an illicit affair.”
Zhang Fengtong’s two earlobes began to redden imperceptibly, and she raised her hand to touch the edge of the earrings dangling down her ears.
Jiafu furrowed her brows and wore a bashful expression. “But I truly admire your demeanor, Zhang jiejie. My heart feels warm looking at jiejie, and I also want to get much closer to jiejie……”
She suddenly let out a soft ‘ah’ and flashed a simper. “My family is far away in Quanzhou, so it is not so easy to pass on word. Fortunately, I have Da Biaoge here! Zhang jiejie can go back first, and I will wait for Da Biaoge to return so I can ask him what he thinks. If he nods in assent, I will accept!”
Since she was young, Zhang Fengtong had already known that her appearance was nothing but average, so she strove her hardest to cultivate her virtues to compensate for her shortcomings. Coupled with the Zhang family’s deliberate aggrandizement, her reputation had spread far and wide in her early teenage years, and she finally lived up to her family’s expectations after her betrothal to Prince Yunzhong’s Heir, Xiao Yintang. During those years, she had met Xiao Yintang several times. She fell for Xiao Yintang at first sight, but Xiao Yintang’s attitude towards her was extremely frigid. Despite knowing that the maids serving Xiao Yintang had more attractive and remarkable features than her, and despite being treated coldly, she was not at all discouraged. She covertly planted a spy in the Prince Manor and gradually garnered some secrets. Last year, when Xiao Yintang traveled to Chuxiong to pay respects to his elders, she exploited this opportunity to meet him again in private and bared her heart to him, expressing her willingness to be a virtuous wife and vowing to do her ultimate best to help him achieve great things in the future. After that time, Xiao Yintang finally altered his attitude towards her, and the two thereafter gradually became more familiar with each other.
A few days ago, Zhang Fengtong suddenly received a letter from Xiao Yintang, apprising her of himself and a girl surnamed Zhen in Quanzhou, asking her to meet the woman on his behalf and to persuade the woman to accede. In order to please him, Zhang Fengtong did not dare to disobey him, which was why she made this trip today. When she first laid eyes on this Zhen girl, she felt as if a cat was clawing at her heart, and when she listened to Jiafu narrating her parents’ matters, she felt as though she had been pricked by a needle. She suspected that the other was mocking her, but as she continued to listen, she could sense that the Zhen girl’s words had a hint of innocence and naivety to them. Perhaps her sentiments just then had been unintentional, and they just so happened to inadvertently strike her sore spots. As doubt, embarrassment, and fury almost overcame her, once Jiafu spoke of letting Pei You’an decide, she instantly returned to her senses. She hastily balked her, “Zhen meimei, I see that my words have enlightened you. I opened my heart to you so intimately like this because I now consider you a good sister. How can whispers between sisters be known to others? You must not let your biaoge know.”
Jiafu blinked her eyes and asked rather abashedly, “But jiejie, did you not say that you want me to nod and follow the Heir? I dare not decide all on my own.”
Zhang Fengtong reluctantly maintained a contrived smile. “It is nothing but my own desire. If you cannot decide all by yourself, then so be it. Could it be that you want me, jiejie, to compel you to accept?”
Jiafu’s complexion eased, and she said with relief, “Good! I was worried about how to broach the matter to Da Biaoge. I would have been so deathly ashamed!”
Zhang Fengtong’s heart that had been ridden with apprehension slowly unknotted, and she no longer mentioned the purpose of her trip. Acting as if nothing had transpired, she blathered on about mundane affairs with Jiafu, made up an excuse, then got up to leave.
With all the warmth and affection she could muster, Jiafu personally walked her to the doorway, promised to go to Chuxiong to visit her next time, and watched her being gracefully assisted up the carriage by a granny who had accompanied her. The carriage door closed, and with an imposing retinue in the front and rear, they gradually disappeared from sight.
As soon as the carriage rolled away, the smile on Jiafu’s face immediately faded. She lowered her head and trudged all the way back to her room on the third floor of the round building. She was only halfway up the stairs when her footsteps became heavy, as if her feet had been filled with lead, and she could no longer take another step up. She halted in place.
The twilight gradually grew richer, and a slanted ray of the setting sun penetrated from the square window at the corner of the stairs, falling at Jiafu’s feet.
Jiafu sat on the stairway, leaned against the wall, and began staring absently at nothing.
Sure enough, Xiao Yintang had not given up and even went so far as to bid Zhang Fengtong to serve as an intermediary. She had just sent her away, but based on Jiafu’s inference, repeated rejections would very likely anger him even more, and there was simply no way he would relent.
Although Pei You’an was now protecting her and had also promised to aid her, she could not remain under Pei You’an’s care this way at all times. More than that, Pei You’an had his own set of affairs to handle, so it was impossible for him to keep her perpetually safe. Sooner or later, she would be sent back to Quanzhou. Once she was out of Pei You’an’s orbit, even if Xiao Yintang would no longer hatch a plot to abduct her, he might still employ whatever underhanded means he had up his sleeve, which she feared might endanger her family. She need not mention what he would do if he became a crown prince, much less an emperor.
When the time would come, would she concede or not?
In her previous life, even though she and Xiao Yintang had laid together countless times, his touch had never evoked even a moiety of genuine warmth from the bottom of her heart.
He demanded obedience, excelled at plundering, and indulged in the beauty and physique she was gifted, while at the same time, whenever he returned to her from the embrace of other women, he would always whisper tenderly to her that he loved only her, and that the rest of the women were nothing but tools in his eyes.
Because of her incapacity to resist, she did not have the courage to oppose him when he had promised the safety of her family, who had believed she had perished amidst the chaos of war many years past. He had showered her with love over and over, and she became the woman he favored most. Over time, despite living like a dead person, even with the awareness that his love had never moved her, she began to believe that he perhaps truly did love her, only that he was helpless in his position.
It was also at the last moment that she finally understood that what truly mattered to him were nothing but his own feelings.
Her own folly had led her to such doom in her past life, but she was given another chance to start anew. In this life, even if she was still this useless, she absolutely refused to let the same man ruin her life once more.
But what could be done to break free from that scourge of a man once and for all?
Jiafu was utterly disconcerted. As she cogitated and ruminated on it, an idea suddenly popped into her head.
Rely on Pei You’an. Marry Pei You’an. Have him marry her. Only by having such an inviolable bond with him could she obtain Pei You’an’s lifelong protection!
Jiafu was not very clear about the nature of the relationship between Pei You’an and Xiao Yintang. If they were friends who had always been on amicable terms, then in this case, if she married Pei You’an, it would doubtless incur Xiao Yintang’s resentment for Pei You’an, and in all likelihood, their relationship would suffer. Furthermore, in Jiafu’s memory, Pei You’an lived only until he was about the age of thirty in her previous life, which was just seven to eight years from the present.
But she could not afford to dwell so much on Pei You’an’s affairs, and there was too little time to consider a matter that would occur far into the future. Now that Xiao Yintang was already closing in on her step after step, she had to find a way to rely on Pei You’an first, and she could slowly consider the rest at a later time.
This audacious and ridiculous idea made Jiafu’s heart race. As if afflicted with fever, her whole body grew hot and cold, and both her hands clenched tightly together.
”Young Lady? Is something wrong? Do you feel unwell?”
A voice came so suddenly, making Jiafu shudder in alarm. She lifted her eyes and saw a maid ascending the stairs with a look of concern on her face upon witnessing her sitting there.
Jiafu shook her head and calmed her mind. She then rose to her feet, dashed up the stairs, and bolted into her room. After shutting the door, she leaned against it, closed her eyes, and exhaled lengthily.
She had to think of a way. She had to quickly think of a way. While she still had the chance, she had to think of a way to get Pei You’an to marry her.
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Footnotes:
1 Jiejie (姐姐) literally means older sister. As I’ve explained in the previous chapter, if the two characters involved are not close or are not actual siblings, I will retain the pinyin so it doesn’t get confusing or awkward.
