Of Mountains and Rivers 36

The Gatekeepers guarded the lonely mountain behind them all year round. All outsiders were enemies to some extent for them. In a way, they were xenophobic, leaving no place to question even for the Mountain Keepers’ sakes.

Chu Huan also had an aura of mystery, so when he stayed behind with the acquiescence of the Gatekeeper Patriarch, Luger, many Gatekeepers looked at him curiously. However, due to the cold face of the Patriarch, they did not dare to rush over to talk to him.

If the life of a Mountain Keeper was simple, then the life of a Gatekeeper was boring.

They were more orderly, stronger in fighting power, and always in a constant state of readiness. Compared with half of the Liyi Mountain Keepers who lived in Shangri-la, the Gatekeepers were more like real warriors.

In the evening, Nanshan and a few others carried some grain from the mountain along with wild vegetables and ham. They roughly washed and cut the ingredients into pieces and threw them into a pot in no particular order.

The pot was so big that it could almost be used as a bathtub; it definitely wouldn’t have been a problem to stew an entire Elder Tang¹. It was hung on a rack while a large flame blazed beneath it. There was no heat control or order to what ingredients were put in. The grains, vegetables, and meat were boiled into a sticky pot of mishmash. All the different kinds of ingredients were broken, overcooked, and undercooked, but the love was boundlessly intertwined².

At the end, a Gatekeeper stood aside with a horizontal knife, picked up a handful of coarse salt, and sprinkled it in, making it look like wind-blown sand. The main course for the evening was ready.

Fortunately, in addition to the stew, there were some other small dishes—there were several small fires next to the cauldron, and the Gatekeepers cleaned up the newly captured beasts, chopped them up, skewered them, and roasted them over the fires. There were also some root vegetables like potatoes and sweet potatoes, which were considered local specialties. They were dug out from the soil and thrown into the fire with the mud still intact. They were not washed as this would give the flesh inside more fragrance and taste.

To put it bluntly, a Gatekeeper’s daily life was quite wild—in Chu Huan’s view, “wild fun” meant that they were as simple as they were brutal.

Unconsciously, however, Chu Huan had learned not to use his narrow point of view to measure other people’s lives, and thus he no longer tried to figure out the meaning of the Gatekeeper’s existence.

Although the languages between the two parties still couldn’t seamlessly connect, Nanshan’s perspective subtly influenced him.

Chu Huan had found that, when he asked about the meaning for living, he didn’t expect any answer—because, if someone told him that the meaning was “plain and light, filled with daily necessities,” he would feel that the other party was confused, and if someone told him that he had “a clear or even noble goal,” then he would feel that it was false.

The reason he asked was just to find a philosophical foothold for himself when he felt empty and confused.

Nanshan told him that everything that existed must have a reason for its existence.

Of course, this was not absolute, and there were some existences that had no purpose; for example, when Chu Huan was about to find a corner to sit down in a low-key manner, a group of people headed by Wooden Club enthusiastically yelled at him, “Bitch King! Come here!”

In his entire life, Chu Huan had never wished more to be deaf.

Yuan Ping laughed beside him like a dog whose tail fluttered in the wind. After laughing, he followed behind reluctantly.

Chu Huan snapped, “Why are you following me?”

Yuan Ping put his hands together. “Following the fun, Bitch King. I’ll have to count on your jokes to live the rest of my life.”

After hearing the first half of the sentence, Chu Huan really wanted to put the plug back into the Sacred Spring, but when he heard the second half, he fell silent.

The words ‘rest of my life’ were like a sudden knife stabbing him coldly, and his body immediately couldn’t bear it.

For the rest of his life . . . What would Yuan Ping do in the future?

Remain trapped in the cycle of life and death forever in the Mountain Gate?

Seeing the sudden change in his face, Yuan Ping asked in a daze, “Why does your face look like you’ve eaten shit . . . You’re moody. I’ve noticed that you’ve become more and more nervous recently.”

Chu Huan remained silent, thinking how Yuan Ping was right.

Chu Huan sat down, no longer in the mood to fight. He took a piece of rough barbecue that was handed to him and stuffed it in his mouth mechanically, without having any appetite or even noticing the taste.

There was commotion all over, with adults running and children jumping around, chattering and shouting something one after another. Suddenly, Two Kicks, who was originally sitting on the side, shook in place as if nails were growing under his buttocks. At first, he just shook unbearably; in the end, his face became flushed, and he looked as though he couldn’t bear it anymore. He stood up abruptly and ran out with his waist covered and his legs crossed.

Wooden Club had a pair of untimely sharp eyes. He caught a glimpse of the movement and immediately raised his voice to purposefully draw attention. “Hey, where are you going?”

This voice was earth-shattering and attracted everyone’s attention to see that Two Kicks kept bending at ninety degrees. Under the eyes of the crowd, he stood stiffly like a fashionable statue, blushing so red that it looked like he came from a bullfight.

Two Kicks said, “I . . . I, I, I—um . . . went ‘that’!”

Knowing the answer already, Wooden Club still asked, “What’s ‘that’?”

Chu Huan suddenly remembered that he had accidentally sprayed the blood of a ‘mad dog’ all over the young man’s face.

The Bitch King showed a meaningful smile at the right time and glanced at Two Kicks’s lower body.

Two Kicks was like a rabbit that had been poked in the ass. He covered his crotch with his hands, trying to hide it, and screamed strangely, “I just peed! What’s wrong with pee? Why are all of you laughing!”

Amidst the laughter of the crowd, the young man was ashamed and indignant, feeling that he had lost his power and had been humiliated in this country. He ran away in short steps as if he was paralyzed.

Nanshan immediately seized this opportunity. With a deliberately innocent expression, he followed up with some ulterior motives. “If we have someone we like, at the age of sixteen or seventeen, we can meet with the Patriarch and get engaged under the witness of the Elder.”

The ‘marriage contract³’ that Nanshan mentioned did not refer to an appointment to marry in the future in Chinese but to the marriage itself. The Mountain Keepers of the Liyi Clan regarded marriage as a vow that could not be broken. Chu Huan had heard him mention that before.

Chu Huan glanced at Nanshan, and his mood became better. He put aside his previous worries for a while and became interested in chatting. “We can’t do that. For us, when the children are still underage, they prepare for college entrance examinations. They can’t get married just like that; the Civil Affairs Bureau will refuse to issue a marriage certificate or tie the knot.”

Nanshan asked, “Then what if you meet someone you like?”

“You hold on.” Chu Huan smirked and said, “Usually, if you are found out by your parents, they will break your legs; otherwise, if you are found out by teachers, you will be asked to write an apology letter—it’s a letter of repentance for mistakes.”

For the first time, Nanshan did not express curiosity about the bizarre life on the other side of the river. He felt that he had made a breakthrough, so he hurriedly asked, “Have you ever written that kind of letter?”

On the other end, Chu Huan had found an opportunity to brag. He waved his hand and said, “How would that be possible? At that time, I was the standard ‘Class President in a white shirt.’ Do you know what it means? It’s just . . .”

Yuan Ping said, “It’s the cheapest, fakest, and best at snitching male coquette in the class.”

Chu Huan picked up a bone and fired it into Yuan Ping’s face. Then he seemed to remember something and said to Nanshan, “Oh wait, I seem to have actually written one once.”

At this moment, to Nanshan’s understanding, writing an apology letter was equivalent to falling in love, and his fist hanging by his side suddenly clenched.

“Of course, it wasn’t from being caught in puppy love.” Chu Huan slowly added the next sentence, “It was because I was doing the people a favor and using my time after school to give a famous douchebag the boot⁴ . . .”

A fierce wind came from the bone Yuan Ping hurled at him, and there was a strong killing intent with both old and new hatred mixed in it. Chu Huan calmly avoided it by turning his head, without looking at the angry Yuan Ping. “There were always people who liked to get scolded.”

Nanshan found that Chu Huan had derailed the prepared topic with another matter.

But the day had already come to this point, so he didn’t want to be roundabout anymore and decided to just ask directly.

Nanshan practiced the words in his heart several times, trying to appear relaxed, but he felt that he wasn’t exactly achieving that goal.

He cared to the extreme and was panicking, so his mannerisms seemed forced. However, Nanshan was unaware of his awkwardness; it seemed as though he had forgotten what was considered natural.

He secretly tortured himself a lot.

When Chu Huan saw that his expression was different, he immediately wiped his hands and leaned forward, touching Nanshan’s forehead. “Are you okay? Did you get hurt just now? Let me see and make sure it doesn’t get infected.”

Nanshan behaved like a frightened raccoon because of the close proximity, his whole body becoming so stiff that he couldn’t move.

Chu Huan frowned, putting his palm on Nanshan’s neck. “Why is your heart beating so fast? Could it be poisoning?”

Nanshan stared blankly into his eyes, which were very close to his, and suddenly felt that he might really be poisoned.

That was when the Elder unwittingly rescued him.

The Elder sat next to the cauldron, his image blurred by the steam, and he tapped the side of the pot with an iron fork. “Patriarch Nanshan, Patriarch Luger, I think we should talk about the business first. After we finish discussing, let the brothers who are not on duty tonight drink some wine, okay?”

Nanshan regained consciousness and returned to his normal state. He quickly avoided Chu Huan’s hand and said in a low voice, “It’s okay.”

He and Luger, the Patriarch of the Gatekeepers, came forward, and everyone gathered around. The chaotic crowd became silent in an instant.

“Although the flat people and Mutayi have always lived in groups,” Luger began straightforwardly, without exchanging pleasantries or other nonsense, “I have never seen such a large-scale siege before, so there must be a new place nearby . . . or something that drove them here.”

Nanshan continued, “If that’s the case, we can’t just stay on the mountain passively now. This time it was Mutayi, but what about next time?”

The Elder twirled his goatee. “As usual, one or two Gatekeepers will follow, and the main manpower will come from our side.”

The mountain was the source of life for their two clans, so no matter what happened to the Gatekeepers, they must never leave the Mountain Gate. Sending only one or two people to go was better.

As if fearing the world was too peaceful, when Yuan Ping heard this, he immediately raised his hand. “I’ll go! I can go!”

Chu Huan pondered for a moment. “I’ll go, too.”

Of course, Chu Huan didn’t want to join in the fun.

The world was full of dangers, and it was fine if he didn’t see them. But now that he had glimpsed the tip of the iceberg, he couldn’t stand by and watch idly. He couldn’t see Nanshan struggling here year after year, or Yuan Ping guarding the Mountain Gate desperately.

He had to gather as much information as possible. Even if he was unable to take them away in the end or to realize his good wishes for Nanshan, at least he could reduce the mortality rate of the Mountain Keepers . . . and the Gatekeepers, to a certain extent.

But when Chu Huan responded like this, Nanshan got the wrong impression.

It was not like this before, when Chu Huan lived in the village of the Liyi Clan. At that time, he didn’t ask any questions and didn’t care about anything. Even though he could understand some of their language, he pretended not to understand it because he was too lazy to care about their troubles.

Why was he suddenly taking initiative this time?

Nanshan couldn’t think of any other reason except Yuan Ping.

But right now was not the time for the Patriarch to think wildly. Nanshan quickly pulled back his sanity from running away and forcibly left it on the matter of investigating the border. There were all kinds of matters to arrange before he left—the mountain was an unprotected place, and the danger was great. Luger couldn’t leave, so as the Patriarch of the Mountain Keepers, Nanshan needed to take the lead.

The Elder took a sip of the stew in his bowl with a heavy heart. “I’m afraid we have to make preparations to kill all the invading enemies. This winter is filled with gloom . . .”

Everyone fell silent for a moment.

Just then, Two Kicks came back from the woods with his pants in his hands, his face flushed. He seemed to be planning to sneak into the crowd, but he was stopped by people with malicious intentions as soon as he took a step. The men seemed to want to adjust the atmosphere, so they all showed their white teeth and laughed around Two Kicks. “You came back so fast.”

Two Kicks began kicking, causing a scuffle between them. 

Nanshan exhaled roughly and waved at the people of the two clans. “It’s over. Let’s serve the wine!”

Luger shook his head. “Everyone should be allowed only one bowl so that they can still be on duty . . .”

This kind of stuffy attitude was immediately abandoned by the crowd. The people of the two clans rushed up, drowning Luger’s voice in the ocean of noise as if they wanted to sweep away the dullness just now. Their attitude demonstrated their desire to enjoy the wine while they still could. 

Two Kicks was knocked down onto the ground by several men. He finally got up to breathe after a while, but he was not angry. He tidied up his clothes silently, sat down with a bowl of wine, and secretly looked at a girl sitting on the other side.

The young man didn’t know how to hide his feelings, so he was quickly spotted by those who observed him. A new round of heckling overwhelmed Two Kicks, an unprofessional puppy love boy, so much that he wished he could disappear into a crack in the ground.

Hearing the commotion, the little girl glanced back and laughed. Two Kicks seemed to have made up his mind. He gritted his teeth and ruthlessly drank the wine in the bowl.

Gathering his courage, Two Kicks strode towards his sweetheart amidst the jeering of the crowd.

Nanshan caught a glimpse from the corner of his eye and realized that he was actually worse than Two Kicks. He immediately felt so angry that he drank the wine in his bowl in one gulp and turned to Chu Huan.

Chu Huan picked up the wine jar and filled it up for him, but Nanshan didn’t touch it.

He looked at Chu Huan with a strange gaze. “It’s dangerous to visit the cave; otherwise, I wouldn’t take the people there myself, you know?”

Chu Huan liked his serious appearance, feeling that his heart would melt at a glance.

Nanshan pursed his lips nervously. “What if something happens to you? What will your relatives do?”

Chu Huan paused, and the smile on his face gradually faded. After a while, he lowered his eyes, saying, “I have no relatives.”

Nanshan asked, “Don’t you have a wife?”

Chu Huan laughed at himself. “She’s still in her mother’s stomach⁵.”

Nanshan felt his heart jump out of his throat for a moment. He heard the sound of his arteries beating wildly and felt a world of flowers blooming around him.

He asked, “So . . . that is, there isn’t someone?”

Chu Huan followed his gaze and saw that Two Kicks was talking clumsily in front of a girl. While talking, his face first turned red as he scratched his ears and cheeks, since he didn’t know what to do. The girl was smiling quietly, and even though her face was also flushed, she was in a better state than him.

Chu Huan couldn’t help showing a smile as he looked at the young man and girl. He wanted to hold Nanshan’s hand, but that would feel abrupt, so he stuffed his empty palm into his trouser pocket and explained to Nanshan, “That—there are many names on our side. The literary ones are ‘lover’ and ‘spouse,’ the ambiguous one is ‘sweetheart’, the simple one is ‘partner,’ and the common ones are ‘boyfriend’ and ‘girlfriend’ . . . Oh, and if you like someone, but they don’t like you, that is ‘unrequited love.’”

Nanshan’s mind was full of confusion, so he had no choice but to worship the Chinese language for creating multiple names for one thing.

“There was no partner.” Chu Huan gazed at his unrequited love, taking a deep breath, and moved his gaze away without any trace, without flaws—at least, in Nanshan’s blinded eyes, there was no flaw.

Then Chu Huan said, “There was one unrequited love.”

Nanshan couldn’t digest the news for a while.

Since it was unrequited love, then he still had a chance, which should be good news, but this kind of good news really didn’t make him happy at all.

Nanshan’s mouth became dry, and he asked, “On the other side of the river?”

Chu Huan avoided his gaze and stared at the wine in his bowl. After a while, he said, with a smile at the corners of his mouth, “It’s in the palm of my hand.”

It was difficult for Nanshan to understand the lingering and deep meaning of the words ‘in the palm of his hand.’ He could only decipher the literal meaning after being dazed.

Put it in the palm of your hand—isn’t that a bean?

A person who is like a bean . . . means someone small and slender, right?

A bowl of cold water was poured over Nanshan’s hot heart just then. He responded indiscriminately and quietly walked away, bending over to fill the soup.

This topic was too sensitive, and Chu Huan felt a little regretful after speaking, fearing that Nanshan would see through him. He was lost in his thoughts for a while.

When he realized that Nanshan was no longer around, Chu Huan searched around worriedly but couldn’t find him, so he had to go back to the flat hillside in front of the Mountain Gate, drinking and worrying.

Then he caught sight of Yuan Ping, who was being poured drinks one after another.

Yuan Ping was drinking so much that he could hardly stand on his feet. Chu Huan stretched out his foot and kicked him, saying contemptuously, “I’ll see how good you are.”

Yuan Ping staggered and rushed over to hug his leg, his eyes unfocused.

Chu Huan was about to kick him away when he heard Yuan Ping’s ravings.

Chu Huan froze suddenly, and after a while, he squatted down slowly, grabbing Yuan Ping’s shoulders with trembling hands. “What did you say?”

Yuan Ping said, “Mom . . .”

Yuan Ping grabbed Chu Huan’s shirt, dazed and almost unable to open his eyes. Then he pulled himself up, rubbing his face casually between Chu Huan’s chest and neck, talking nonsensically, “Mom, I miss you, Mom . . . Dad, don’t be angry, um, don’t be jealous, I miss you too . . .”

When he was sober, he asked about his job, a girl, and even his cat, but he never dared to bring up this matter.

Chu Huan slowly stretched out his arms to wrap them around Yuan Ping’s back. He listened to him call out “Dad” and “Mom” for a while, speechless. He raised his eyes and looked up at the sky.

There was nothing for him to look up at, but he was afraid that tears would fall if he lowered his head.